I remember everything that I get in the mail. I remember opening every package, pulling out every piece of wrapping (the air filled plastic pockets, the styrofoam popcorns, bubble wrap, confetti, newspaper- all of it), and writing every thank you card to send off in return. I'm very appreciative of everything given to me and my children, everything has meaning.
When I was pregnant with Charlie, shortly after finding out that we were having a boy, I received a package at my doorstep from my wonderful Grammy, filled with handmade burp cloths, and this thing (which would later become known to us, as "Lovey")...
Now I'm not one for decorative things, especially pillows (in my way, in my way, in my way). I've always tossed them to the side, and then they end up cluttering either the floor or a closet space. So what was I to do with this half dog thing, sewn onto what could only be described as a baby body pillow??
I tossed it to the side, naturally- into the pack 'n play it went.
Well. Soon that pack 'n play became Charlie's downstairs sleepy time area (nap times, quiet times, I-have-nowhere-else-to-put-you-so-you'll-sit-here-for-now times), and one day when I peeked in on him, to see how his slumber was going, I noticed that he had wrapped his entire body around the pillow, hugging it with all of his might.
"Awwww!", I said out loud. He had found a friend.
Little did I know, that pillow would become much more than just a friend, but the two of them become companions. Soon the pillow had to start going from the pack 'n play into the bassinet with him. And when he moved from the bassinet to the crib, the pillow went there too. And I'll never forget the day that I realized that the pillow was not just a pillow, but... Charlie's Lovey.
He had just woken up from a nap, and when we came downstairs, I just could not comfort him. For an hour, I must have pulled my hair out trying to figure out what was wrong with this child. "Why are you crying? Why aren't you happy? I've given you milk, I've snuggled you, your diaper is clean, we're watching cartoons, what is wrong with you?!" ...and then it dawned on me (as I thought back to an episode of Imagination Movers). I scooped him up, and we darted up the stairs together.
You should have seen the look on his face, when I pulled Lovey out of his bed.
The happiest little boy EVER.
Charlie had found a Lovey.
As hes grown older, Charlie's love for Lovey has intensified, and the two cannot possibly be separated, for anything. His Big Sister had a similar relationship at this age, with her blankie, which I have to constantly remind Christopher of as he gets frustrated with the situation at hand.
If we get in the car without Lovey-
If we go into the store without Lovey-
If Charlie gets knocked down or hurt in any "oh you're fine, its just a little bump" kind of way, and Lovey isn't within arms reach-
If Charlie doesn't feel well, and Lovey isn't there to comfort him-
If we forget Lovey upstairs-
If Lovey falls out of the crib-
If (God forbid) Lovey has to take a bath in the washing machine-
...seriously. You'd think this child was being tortured. The two just simply cannot be separated. And that, is that.
Want to see what happens if something comes between the two? If Lovey is inside and Charlie is out?
This. A whoooole lotta pouting. Complete misery. A halt to all activities. Life suddenly comes becomes nothing more than agony.
And while it makes me crazy sometimes, I understand.
I still have a Lovey.
Right, I know, I'm 26 years old, but- I still sleep with the same teddy bear that I've had since I was 2 or 3 years old. The dang thing isn't much more than a pile of matted threads by now, having fallen apart in nearly every way possible, but I love my "Jingle Bear" very much. And while I can easily walk away from him and my life would still go on- that wasn't always the case. When I was younger, I would have DIED, had Jingle Bear gone missing.
Luckily though, there were duplicates, of Jingles. So if that had ever happened (which maybe it did? Once or twice?), had Jingles in fact gone missing, there was a plan B. Swap him out. When I was that young, I probably would have never known.
The other day as we were leaving the Walmart parking lot, Charlie began screaming "Lubies! Lubies!", in his somebody-shot-me voice, and my mind immediately flashed to the worst.
Oh Lord. We've lost Lovey.
"Stop the car! Stop the car right now!", I started to yell. And I wasn't kidding, I was literally ready to jump out of the van and run back into the store. I'd go through every aisle 1,000 times if I had to. I cannot imagine life, without that anxiety causing yet equally loving blue puppy dog pillow.
So as Charlie sat there screaming, and Christopher looked for a parking spot- I frantically started organizing what I'd do, if Lovey was lost for good.
And friends, I'm not kidding when I tell you that I started to have a heart attack. I was pouring sweat, I couldn't breathe, my heart was racing-
We, would, be, screwed.
Charlie's everything would go from this...
to this...
Can you imagine looking at that face every day?
We *found* Lovey, by the way. He had slipped out of Charlie's lap, and fallen between his seat and the door. Thank goodness it was only a scare! BUT-
I'm begging you friends. BEGGING YOU. We can't go through that again. We can't through that for real.
Help me find another Lovey?
Help me find a backup?
I don't care how much it is. I don't care if I have to travel to China to get one. I don't know what I'd do, had we REALLY lost that pillow.
Help me?
I've already preformed surgery on Lovey's arm once. It came off completely, in the dryer, after Charlie took him swimming in the kiddie pool out front (despite my best efforts). And I'd gladly sew that arm on over and over and over again. But what do I do, if Lovey goes missing, and there isn't an arm to sew?
Help me find a backup Lovey!?
I'm desperate.
Clearly, things like this, prove to us how bat-crap crazy we Mother's can get, when it comes to just how much we love our children.
*EDIT: Lovey has been FOUND! My amazing friend Tina, located the maker of Lovey by doing a yahoo search (wow google, really? way to fail me). The only problem we've got now, is that Lovey really is made in China (see and I thought I was totally joking when I originally said I'd travel that far), and so far we only know how to buy 2400 of them at a time. I've sent an email to the maker, asking them about how I might be able to go about finding out how to buy less than a billion, so now the next step, is locating a retailer to buy one (or ten) from.
Click here to see Lovey's catalog page.
Thank you everyone for your ongoing help. Thank you thank you thank you.