Friday, April 1, 2011
Things have been weird lately. Usually I make blogging a priority- its kind of like my therapy. I sit down, I type, I release. But recently, it kind of feels like a chore? ...am I getting burnt out?
Ever since Christopher started working the night shift, I feel like I've kinda traded in some of my freedom for an extra work load. And its not his fault, even though sometimes I know he could leave work a few minutes earlier than he does, its just how it is.
So by the end of the night, when the kids are finally in bed and my me-time surfaces- I'm just exhausted. The last thing that I want to do is sit down at the computer and put my mind to work. Besides, I've still got toy trains to pick up, and dirty sippy cups to wash. Sometimes the floor needs to be steam mopped, and then when all thats done, and its 11:30, the baby wakes up for another round of milk, because shes still stricly breastfed (her choice, not mine), and-
...wait, did I ever blog?
God please, give me a break.
So last night when it came time to do my flashback, I just didn't. Christopher had come home early for the first time in a billion years, and I dragged him over to the couch with me to drink tea and watch Weeds season one on instant netflix for 2 hours.
And it was a relief.
Not answering emails, and not checking my status on anything anywhere, was a relief.
And that makes me wonder if maybe I'm rounding the bend to the end of my blogging road? ...okay that sounds a bit drastic, but- I've got to make changes. I've got to figure out a better time to do it. A better way to do it.
Maybe no more picture editing? Just throw them all up there straight out of camera. Maybe try to get up a little bit earlier to do it before we start our day? But then whos going to make breakfast. Maybe in the afternoon right before hubby goes to work? But he needs the computer for his homework around that same time.
I'll find my balance.
It'll all work out.
After all, even though I feel like I'm talking to myself most of the time, I do write the things that I write for my children, and their children, and their children (okay, and sometimes other moms, assuming that they're reading from time to time), with the hopes that all of these entries publish up nicely into cute little books that will float from family bookshelf to bookshelf until the end of time.
...Um. Its Flashback Friday, isn't it?
What if I just post a bunch of random pictures? No real theme today, no real stories, just- photos. Because my brain is still kind of on empty from that awful macrobid reaction, and as I'm browsing through my Flickr account, there are just so many things that I want to share with everyone today.
This is a picture that Christopher took during our first week or so of dating. I was laying on his couch at his house in the Portland ghetto, and his kitten, or his roomates kitten rather, had fallen asleep on my chest.
Christopher used to take pictures with film cameras. Remember those? Hes still got a few cameras out in the garage. I think he said that he had gotten them from his Mom? Maybe he should clean them up and put them to good use.
This is one of the few pictures thats hes ever taken of me, where I didn't command him to pick up the camera, point and shoot. Maybe thats why I love it so much. Because its organic.
A picture of the sunset from our first Texas fair. It was hot that day, I was pregnant with Charlie, but by night fall- it was gorgeous, and totally worth the smell of cow dung and fried foods that we sadly couldn't eat. We did get to drink freshly squeezed lemonade though, loaded with sugar. And it was sooo good.
There were a couple of summers where I spent a lot of time standing on the side of the stage, dodging flying drumsticks. I never got hit, but I remember a very specific time where I thought someone was going to take my head off with one of the dang things (Kalii, Cyrus, remember?).
Going to shows was a way of existance. Summers and music were basically the same thing. Maybe those days won't be behind me forever? I'll gladly be the crazy old lady thats desperately trying to be young again, taking up space and dancing like a hippie, embarrassing the crap out of my kids.
Me and my friend Katie. Eating babaganoush, listening to playmate of the year, and drinking enough beer to flood our houses with.
Getting my last tattoo, 4 years ago. That script was read at our wedding. Christopher and I both had it tattood on ourselves for our one year anniversary.
I've been pregnant/breastfeeding ever since.
A picture of me and chubby baby Charlie, playing at the park. Awww, look at his 3 chins. I miss them.
Aaaand last but not least, one of the most awkward and badly timed family portraits that we've ever taken one handed.
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