Wednesday, June 10, 2009
Last night when I finally got a chance to lay on the couch, I collapsed with the intentions of never getting up again, ever. The pain in my legs by that point was so intense that I had literally shed a single tear on my trip down the stairs 5 minutes before. Not only did I feel like a huge wuss, being the wife of an obviously fit and trim Airman (its so embarrassing sometimes, I hate it), but was I seriously considering crawling? ...I was. I wanted to. Christopher offered to carry me, which he can do (and has) now that I've dropped a big chunk of weight, but that's embarrassing too. I asked him to instead, massage my legs while I watched Vh1. He kept rubbing too deep, which was probably really just a light touch, and I flinched and shouted in agony for him to get away from me. "No I didn't mean it, come back, helllp mmeeee" I begged. And then before I knew it, hubbs had made me a hot (as hot as the water would go) lavender bubble bath, complete with candles. I know, "awww", right? The bath was amazing, and left me feeling almost human again. Until I stood up.
Waking up this morning was near impossible. I didn't want to. I felt I couldn't. I hated the idea of getting out from underneath my covers. I picked up the fussing baby, and snuggled him up next to me so that he had no choice but to fall back asleep. This worked for about 30 minutes, which was plenty of time for my body to accept its fate, and get moving. By the time I got around to doing the shred, I was pleasantly surprised that I was slowly regaining use of my leg muscles. They still burned with every step, but at least they were strong enough to support my weight as I hovered with a bowl full of pureed bananas in front of a wiggly eating machine.
Today I turned the 30 Day Shred into a game. Kind of. I set up my workout space, and a small space beside it for my 2 year old daughter. I gave her wooden toy trains for weights, and when the DVD started, told her to do exactly like the ladies on TV did. At first, this was hilarious and silly to the max. She squealed with laughter at everything. "Are you doing jumping jacks, Mommy?! HAHAHAH!". Her laughing made me laugh, and made my workout that much more difficult, but so much more fun. And when the laughter slipped away, I noticed that I was actually keeping up with Jillian. I didn't have to modify the moves. The things that I had worked hard at the past 2 days, I decided to ease up on, and work harder at the things I had slacked on. Abs. The very last round of ab work during the routine is a killer. Bicycle crunches for 1 minute. I did them. The entire minute. Just as slow and agonizing as they do them on the video. Gasping and grunting for air, but I did them. Eleanore layed on her mat (a folded up Barbie comforter) asking me over and over and over if she could have juice (which, haha little girl, you don't know it, but I've been giving you water, and just calling it juice, take that!). "Are you done Mommy, are you done?!". Yes. Yes my dear, I'm done. Wait... I'm done? I did it? Really? Yesterday I had told myself there was no way that I would be able to do another lunge again as long as I lived, and yet here I was, with a small sweat puddle on the floor where my back had just been, and I was... done?