Tia and the no good very bad hair day.

Friday, April 4, 2008

I've been repeating the same hair pattern all my life. I'm never satisfied. I decide I want to grow my hair out, so I can curl the ends and people will possibly mistake me for Bettie Page. But as soon as it starts getting longer, it loses height. And the way I see it, the bigger, the better. Big hair gives me confidence (not to mention makes me look thinner). As do cigarettes, sunglasses, and holding a hot beverage. So just as its halfway to the Bettie, I decide that the height is now more important, and whack it all off. This I do by myself, in my bathroom, with the same pair of dull scissors that I've used since the beginning. I'll cut, and cut, and cut until really there is nothing left to cut. And its the same choppy mess that I end up with every time. Short on the top and in the back, longer in the front. Only, I'm no hairstylist. So while it looks okay, it also looks like crap. It'll work this time, but come tomorrow when I have to take a shower and then re-style it... god be with me. So the scissors lay by the sink for the next 2 months, as I'm now doing daily touch ups on my horrible disaster of a confidence boost. Not only am I not satisfied with how short it is now, but I'm disappointed in myself for giving up on growing it out. Again. Well, if the length is wrong, then, maybe it doesn't need to be black anymore either! Someone take me to town, I need new color. How about blond? I don't care if my hair is currently jet black, I want it platinum, and I want it platinum today. 5 trips to the beauty school later, my hair is completely wasted, 30% platinum, and definitely falling out. And now that its blond ...does my face look washed out? Ugh. It does. The only way to make my hair look good now, is to wear 40 lbs of makeup 24 hours a day. I can't do that! It sure would be fun, but I'm just way too busy, and lets face it, way too lazy. I could have gotten away with that back before Eleanore landed in my uterus, but now? Wait. I went through all the trouble for these gorgeous country fried golden locks, lets give this makeup thing a go. Lots of powder, lots of blush, tons of eyeliner, bright red lipstick ...the works. Is that a pimple? Is that another one? Great, I'm breaking out. Okay, so now I'm not just wearing the makeup to look good with my hair, I'm wearing it to cover up my breakouts, from wearing too much makeup? This is getting out of control. I've got to put a stop to it. ...How about I color it red? I've never been red! Take me to the store honey, Mama's gettin' new hair! Two hours later, its purple. What went wrong? Who cares, I can rock the purple. I can rock anything. You know what would look good with purple? Bandanas. Lots and lots of bandanas. But, now that its been a week and the purple has faded to a pale old lady gray, I'm not so rockin'. And was that color even bold enough to be called puple in the first place? I think not. Back to the store. Lets go auburn, whatdya think? And since my hair has kind of grown over the past few months, how about v-bangs? I haven't had those in awhile. The combination of auburn and new bangs are a hit with me, and everyone else (oh my gosh doesn't Christopher look so goofy in that picture? hahah, cutie). It looks fantastic. My skin is clearing up. My eyes stand out. I think I'll keep it. Until I come across a box of old photos. ...Look at how close I was to Bettie hair! Oh it looked so good. I miss that hair. I've been auburn for at least 2 months. I could just color it back to black and try again? And maybe trim it, to make it bigger. I know that would take even longer to grow it out, but it'll be black, so it won't be so bad. These are the thoughts that play over and over again on the mix tape inside my head. I can't make it stop. Christopher left for a TDY (temporary duty station) in South Dakota this past February. The day he left I colored it black. And after I did it, I was sure it was the worst hair I had ever had, and I hated it. Only because I bought the ultra cheap box, and it left my hair with a purplish tint. After a few washes the tint was gone. When he got home a month later, he assured me I looked gorgeous and that he loved it. Everyone else loved it. I learned to love it. Before I knew it, my roots had grown out. This could go either way. I could leave it. I could change it. I could pull a Britney and just shave it all off! ...Last night I colored it again. And I did not cut it. I've gone at least 6 months without cutting it myself. I had a slight trim back in December, but that's it. I should have just kept it long and black in the first place. Check in on me again at the end of summer and we'll see where I stand. My name is Tia, and I'm a self destructive hairaholic.

From top to Bottom:
-Bettie Page Pin up Cheeta Print Headband (which I actually have), By pinuppixie, $8.00.
-Leopard Print headband (modeled by muah), By Mixbaby, $7.99.


Tizzalicious April 4, 2008 at 11:55 AM  

Haha, this is SO familiar! I'm never happy with my hair either, and when I go get it cut (or DIY it) usually I hate it even more. Aaargh.

Thanks for showing my clips! :)

Aly The Red-Bliss Monkey Studio April 4, 2008 at 1:07 PM  

I love the last pic of you in this post! And your blog cracked me up. It's ironic that you visited my blog yesterday, when today is MY big post about my haircut.... not nearly as dramatic, but I'm donating it, which is fun....

Love your stuff, Grrl!


A Blond And A Torch April 4, 2008 at 1:24 PM  

It is the age old hair dilemma!

Born 2 Bee Wild April 4, 2008 at 10:24 PM  

This was so great to read today because last night I got drunk and cut bangs. ;P I haven't had bangs in 12 years! WHAT HAVE I DONE?!?!

Callooh Callay April 4, 2008 at 11:49 PM  

Oh, you and Christopher look so sweet in that photo--like Darla and Dobie going to the hop. The last color is my favorite, but you've gotta follow your bliss.

Christopher And Tia April 5, 2008 at 9:21 AM  

tizzalicious- You're welcome! They're way cute, and would make an at home crappy hair job all better :)

aly- I went and read your blog. I think thats so generous of you to donate your hair like that.

Susan- I bet you look rockin'! You have to post a picture immedietely!

callooh callay- Aw thank you! Christopher makes the funniest faces in pictures sometimes.

PamperingBeki April 5, 2008 at 10:59 PM  

Haha!! You are too funny. I'm LOVING that headband!

altjoujou April 6, 2008 at 11:52 AM  

LOL! I'm a member of the DIY Haircutting Club, too. (eep!)

Aaaannnd... still waiting for big hair to come back. ;)

Love your long bangs! And your pic with the hubby is adorable!

Christopher And Tia April 6, 2008 at 1:18 PM  

beki, isn't that headband great?! headbands are life savers for me.

altjoujou, big hair never went away. not in our house at least, haha.

Cicada Studio April 6, 2008 at 9:03 PM  

Again and again, your blog is throughly entertaining! I can relate to this post myself.

Me... May 14, 2008 at 1:57 PM  

Tia, My name is Janea and I am a destructive hairaholic. Though now I do have an awesome hair dresser that I see every 5 weeks to keep myself from going crazy and chopping my hair (most of the time)...the color that is another story...I AM ADDICTED TO COLOR. I have a membership to Sally's beauty supply and they know me by name. I wanted to go to beauty school but decided I wanted benies instead...lol Now I am a state employee that normally has blue black hair cut in an inverted bob with baby doll bangs...though this can change at any minute...

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