4 Years Enlisted

This week marks Christopher's 4th anniversary of enlisting into and joining the Air Force. On April 26th, 2006, he signed his life away, shaved all of his thick curly hair off, and hopped on a plane to San Antonio to start his training.

At the time, I was completely lost without him. I didn't know how to live, without him being a text message away. I cried myself to sleep every night he was away in basic. I wrote him letter after letter after letter, 3 letters a day, to try to help pass my empty minutes. It was a desperate sort of love, but hopefully in that, Christopher saw how important he was to me.

In June, while 6 1/2 months pregnant, I packed up all of my things, said goodbye to my best friend, my family, my home- and started the biggest adventure of my life.

I stopped in Boise, 9 hours away from my parents house in Woodland Washington, and collected Christopher's mom, who had volunteered to be my copilot. Christopher didn't know she was coming. He barely knew I was coming, since I had planned the trip at the very last minute. Together, her and I drove across the country in my recently purchased Chevy Tracker, in the heat of an unfamiliar summer, passing real life cowboys at rest stops and avoiding near horror flick scenarios at the scariest of fly infested ghost town diners- and within a week, we made our way all the way down to Lackland Air Force Base, to celebrate Christopher's basic training graduation.

I was so excited to finally hit the X on our map. All of the heartburn, all of the frustration, all of the driving with my mother in law (you know I love you Nonie)- was all finally adding up to something. I'll never forget when my phone rang, just a few minutes after we had crossed the Texas border. I hadn't talked to him in weeks, I was aching to hear his voice, and here I was, telling him how close I was to seeing him.

After a long exhausting journey, a drawn out ceremony of everybody looking exactly the same, all dressed in blue, and hundreds of people marching around in big square formations- I ran from the bleachers to find and greet my airman.

And even though he wouldn't put his arms around me, or show me any kind of affection at all- I was happy to be there with him.

See, Christopher was a little, hmmm, how can I say this in the nicest possible way... big headed, when he first graduated. We've talked about it several times since then, and we can actually laugh about it now, but what it boils down to, is that he had never really achieved such a great accomplishment, and let his pride sort of eat him alive? Yeah, well he deserved it, so, I forgive him.

He wouldn't kiss me, or hug me, or even really talk to me, when we were in public. The entire time he was gone, I had been doing nothing but writing him letters, growing his baby, missing him, and planning on and then making the trip to be with him. So for him to kind of reject me... I went a little crazy, can you imagine?

But to be fair, I can see things from his point of view too. He was on a high horse. And rightfully so. To a certain extent. He had worked hard, and I was being much too needy. There was for sure an adjustment period for the two of us, but we got through it. And if we can get through that, we can get through anything.

Who wants to see more pictures??

Christopher is clearly distracted, and I look like a puppy

Christopher and his Mama

Hand on my baby belly

Christopher and his Mom walking around the air park at Lackland

Catching up on some history

And a quick picture in front of a plane

Classy, right?

Theres an entire stack more of pictures of us standing in front of random planes, a few more pictures of Christopher standing at attention, more bad angles and captures of my double chin (seriously, I gained so much weight when I was pregnant with Eleanore), but these were the pick of the litter.

We've come a long way in the last 4 years. And I hear we're in it for life.

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Birthday Wish List

Christopher keeps asking me what I want for my birthday. Every day, at least twice. Every time he asks, I answer with "nothing", because really, I have absolutely everything that I need. "But what do you want?", he asks. "Nothing", I respond with, because if y'all remember, a few months back I got my new Canon Rebel, and at the time, I considered that to be my everything present- covering every gift giving holiday at least until Christmas. I wasn't just saying that, I really am in love with it, and the only thing I hope to see on my birthday, is a chocolate raspberry cake, made with love by my beautiful family. I know that sounds lame. But I'm lame, so-

Today while I was putting away the dishes, I was thinking back to when I was younger, and I'd ask my mom what she wanted on her birthday. She'd say "nothing", too. Only, she'd say it in a way that was that was heavy with self pity, and with that I never knew how to react. She wanted something, but didn't want to tell me what, because- well I don't know why? I put a plate on the bottom rack, and then glanced over the counter into the living room. I really, truly, have everything that I need. I have more than I need. I have things that I never even dreamt I'd have. How beautifully blessed am I? A house. A family. A warm cup of coffee to help round out my sanity every morning while I'm waking up. What more could I possibly want?

Wait. I can want things.

But what do I want?

So I decided to make a wish list. A birthday wish list. I sat down at the computer (both of them, on and off throughout the day. 10 minutes on the couch, cook dinner, 10 minutes at the desk, feed the babies, 10 minutes on the couch) and started hearting things on Etsy and google searching anything that came to mind. A couple right clicks and save pictures as later, and I was finished.

It turns out there actually are things that I want...



1. A coffee mug cozy. In blue. Its bright and fun, and maybe my coffee would stay warmer for just a few extra minutes.

2. Some heart shaped measuring spoons. With cute sayings on them. "a pinch of kindness", aww!
3. A yummy red Macintosh Apple scented candle. Not "baked apple pie" or "apple crisp", but Macintosh Apple.

4. Aloe bath bombs. Any bath bombs, really, but aloe sounds particularly nice, doesn't it?

5. A KitchenAid stand mixer. Maybe in yellow? Maybe in blue? I really don't care, just having one would be nice.

6. A really fun macro lens to go with my everything-gift.

7. This "No Gluten Necessary" print. Theres actually a cute little series of them, but I like this one the most.

8. I looooove the music of Stevie Nicks. In the geekiest of ways. I even went so far as to ask Christopher if we could name our child Bella Donna. He said no, haha. So this shirt would probably become my new favorite. In an XL, since its American Apparel, and after having the bean even that will be a stretch.



1. Yellow Rose Stud earrings. I don't have very many items in my jewelry collection. My favorite pair of earrings broke recently, and now I don't have any studs at all. These ones would look nice, I think?

2. Some blue rain boots. Like the one in this picture? Maybe some blue floral rain boots. I want to go puddle stomping. Ok and maybe I want the picture too.

3. This Print reminds me of the Time Travelers Wife. I haven't finished the book yet (I don't even know where it is, I think I hid it in the desk drawer and then ...think its still there?). I lose myself in that book, and maybe thats why I haven't finished it yet, so I can make it last longer.

4. Don't laugh. I want this wolf tank dress, and I want it bad. We saw it at a booth when we went to the Rattlesnake Roundup, and I've been obsessed with it ever since. It would be so hideously perfect on me. I need it. In a size L.

5. A chocolate raspberry cake. I want my babies and husband to all huddle in the kitchen together, wearing matching aprons, holding wooden spoons and plastic bowls, throwing gluten free flours into the air- yum!

6. A butterfly cat coffee mug. Yes, such a thing does exist!

7. More pictures of fruit. I don't have much of a theme in my kitchen, but ever since I've had my own stove to cook on, the only things I've wanted to hang on the walls around it have been pictures of grapes and apples. Even though I can't have either of those things. Fruit is pretty.

8. A bird bath. How about... a mermaid bird bath?! Yes? I've been telling Christopher about how I want a bird bath for months now, but I really don't want to pay full price for one. I'm hoping that randomly we'll come across one at a garage sale sometime this summer, or find one on sale when we're least expecting it. And wouldn't it be amazing it if was mermaid themed?? I'll take what I can get.

Yay, that was fun. It was like internet window shopping. I got to browse brightly colored kitchen gadgets and tank dresses all while changing diapers and putting together tuna noodle casseroles. Now, I probably won't get around to doing that again for another year, maybe longer, but- it sure was fun! Happy birthday to me next Wednesday!